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Dear President Obama:
I’m planning to move my family and extended family into Mexico
for my health, and I would like to ask you to assist me.
We’re planning to simply walk across the border from the U.S. Into Mexico,
and we’ll need your help to make a few arrangements.
We plan to skip all the legal stuff like visas, passports, immigration
quotas and laws.
I’m sure they handle those things the same way you do here. So, would you
mind telling your buddy, President Calderon, that I’m on my way over?
Please let him know that I will be expecting the following:
1. Free medical care for my entire family.
2. English-speaking government bureaucrats for all services I might need,
whether I use them or not.
3. Please print all Mexican government forms in English.
4. I want my grandkids to be taught Spanish by English-speaking (bi-lingual)
teachers.
5. Tell their schools they need to include classes on American culture and
history.
6. I want my grandkids to see the American flag on one of the flag poles at
their school.
7. Please plan to feed my grandkids at school for both breakfast and lunch.
8. I will need a local Mexican driver’s license so I can get easy access to
government services.
9. I do plan to get a car and drive in Mexico , but, I don’t plan to
purchase car insurance, and I probably won’t make any special effort to
learn local traffic laws.
10. In case one of the Mexican police officers does not get the memo from
their president to leave me alone, please be sure that every patrol car has
at least one English-speaking officer.
11. I plan to fly the U.S. Flag from my house top, put U S. Flag decals on
my car, and have a gigantic celebration on July 4th. I do not want any
complaints or negative comments from the locals.
12. I would also like to have a nice job without paying any taxes, or have
any labor or tax laws enforced on any business I may start.
13. Please have the president tell all the Mexican people to be extremely
nice and never say critical things about me or my family, or about the
strain we might place on their economy.
14. I want to receive free food stamps.
15. Naturally, I’ll expect free rent subsidies.
16. I’ll need Income tax credits so although I don’t pay Mexican Taxes, I’ll
receive money from the government.
17. Please arrange it so that the Mexican Gov’t pays $4,500 to help me buy a
new car.
18. Oh yes, I almost forgot, please enroll me free into the Mexican Social
Security program so that I’ll get a monthly income in retirement.
I know this is an easy request because you already do all these things for
all his people who walk over to the U..S. From Mexico . I am sure that
President Calderon won’t mind returning the favor if you ask him nicely.
Thank you so much for your kind help.
You’re Da man!!!
Barack Obama is our 44th president, but there actually have only been 43 presidents: Cleveland was elected for two nonconsecutive terms and is counted twice, as our 22nd and 24th president.
EIGHT PRESIDENTS were born British subjects: Washington, J. Adams, Jefferson, Madison, Monroe, J. Q. Adams, Jackson, and W. Harrison.
NINE PRESIDENTS never attended college: Washington, Jackson, Van Buren, Taylor, Fillmore, Lincoln, A. Johnson, Cleveland, and Truman. The college that has the most presidents as alumni (seven in total) is Harvard: J. Adams, J. Q. Adams, T. Roosevelt, F. Roosevelt, Rutherford B. Hayes, J. F. Kennedy, and George W. Bush.
PRESIDENTS WHO would be considered “Washington outsiders” (i.e., the 18 presidents who never served in Congress) are: Washington, J. Adams, Jefferson, Taylor, Grant, Arthur, Cleveland, T. Roosevelt, Taft, Wilson, Coolidge, Hoover, F. Roosevelt, Eisenhower, Carter, Reagan, Clinton, and G. W. Bush.
THE MOST COMMON religious affiliation among presidents has been Episcopalian, followed by Presbyterian.
THE ANCESTRY of all 43 presidents is limited to the following seven heritages, or some combination thereof: Dutch, English, Irish, Scottish, Welsh, Swiss, or German.
THE OLDEST president inaugurated was Reagan (age 69); the youngest was Kennedy (age 43). Theodore Roosevelt, however, was the youngest man to become president——he was 42 when he succeeded McKinley, who had been assassinated.
THE TALLEST president was Lincoln at 6’4″; at 5’4″, Madison was the shortest.
FOURTEEN PRESIDENTS served as vice presidents: J. Adams, Jefferson, Van Buren, Tyler, Fillmore, A. Johnson, Arthur, T. Roosevelt, Coolidge, Truman, Nixon, L. Johnson, Ford, and George Bush.
VICE PRESIDENTS were originally the presidential candidates receiving the second-largest number of electoral votes. The Twelfth Amendment, passed in 1804, changed the system so that the electoral college voted separately for president and vice president. The presidential candidate, however, gradually gained power over the nominating convention to choose his own running mate.
FOR TWO YEARS the nation was run by a president and a vice president who were not elected by the people. After Vice President Spiro T. Agnew resigned in 1973, President Nixon appointed Gerald Ford as vice president. Nixon resigned the following year, which left Ford as president, and Ford’s appointed vice president, Nelson Rockefeller, as second in line.
THE TERM “First Lady” was used first in 1849 when President Zachary Taylor called Dolley Madison “First Lady” at her state funeral. It gained popularity in 1877 when used in reference to Lucy Ware Webb Hayes. Most First Ladies, including Jackie Kennedy, are said to have hated the label.
JAMES BUCHANAN was the only president never to marry. Five presidents remarried after the death of their first wives——two of whom, Tyler and Wilson, remarried while in the White House. Reagan was the only divorced president. Six presidents had no children. Tyler——father of fifteen——had the most.
PRESIDENTS LINCOLN, Garfield, McKinley, and Kennedy were assassinated in office.
ASSASSINATION ATTEMPTS were made on the lives of Jackson, T. Roosevelt, F. Roosevelt, Truman, Nixon, Ford, Carter, Reagan, G. H. W. Bush, Clinton, and G. W. Bush.
EIGHT PRESIDENTS died in office: W. Harrison (after having served only one month), Taylor, Lincoln, Garfield, McKinley, Harding, F. Roosevelt, and Kennedy.
PRESIDENTS ADAMS, Jefferson, and Monroe all died on the 4th of July; Coolidge was born on that day.
KENNEDY AND TAFT are the only presidents buried in Arlington National Cemetery.
LINCOLN, JEFFERSON, F. Roosevelt, Washington, Kennedy, and Eisenhower are portrayed on U.S. coins.
WASHINGTON, JEFFERSON, Lincoln, Jackson, Grant, McKinley, Cleveland, Madison, and Wilson are portrayed on U.S. paper currency.
