“This week, President Obama attended what was either the G-20 summit or his high school reunion. I haven’t seen old white dudes this excited about meeting a black guy since Michael Jordan’s fantasy camp.” –Seth Meyers
“Michelle Obama was photographed in London wearing clothes from J-Crew, the store is selling out of the clothes she’s been wearing. Now if someone could just get her to drive a Chrysler.” –Seth Meyers
“When the president met with Queen Elizabeth, he presented her with an iPod loaded with Broadway show tunes while she gave him a silver framed picture of her and Prince Phillip. There were no winners in that gift exchange, because when I think of things an 83-year-old, super-rich British woman would want, an iPod is pretty far down the list, right between a bus pass and sneakers with the wheels on the bottom.” –Seth Meyers
“And when I think of what a 47-year-old, super-cool black dude would want, a picture of an 83-year-old white lady is last. Now I’m not saying it’s easy to buy the Queen a gift. She wears the same outfit every day and her only hobby is waving.” –Seth Meyers
“But if you’re looking for gift ideas for foreign leaders, you should check with the State Department and not Sasha and Malia. And while we’re at it, Queen, a picture of yourself is not a good gift. Let’s try to remember, you’re world leaders, not Secret Santas.” –Seth Meyers
“New York Mayor Mike Bloomberg praised Reverend Al Sharpton, calling him a calming influence on the city. Wow! What are the odds of a city having two reverends named Al Sharpton?” –Seth Meyers
